FIC: Dawn is Breaking (V/VI)

[madame_denna]

Pairing: Denna/Kahlan
Rating: R
Words: ~2442
Warnings: character death, explicit violence and torture, dubious consent & content
Summary: Kahlan needs to cope with a new and different life. After an apocalyptic battle in a world in which Darken Rahl has won and she has lost almost everything. Except for Denna. Kahlan can't quite decide if it's a good thing, or the worst. After all, Denna is there to help.
Disclaimer: No copyright infringement intended. They are not mine and - of course no money is made. I don't own any of them, but I have a distinctive feeling Denna might own me...
A/N: I'll finish this fic if it's the last thing I do. You know who to blame..



Part IV

The candle lights flicker as the door closes behind her, casting her captive’s quarters in a warm glow. The key turns in the lock and the sound of footsteps fades out in the distance.

A fire cracks in a corner and Kahlan turns her heavy eyes on its quiet calmness. The dry warmth settles itself around her bare shoulders like a blanket and fills the night with a scent of spice and something earthy.

Standing barefoot on the stone tiles, she simply waits for Denna to arrive. Kahlan knows better than to sit down, let alone sleep on the ground. Even if she is tired. Oh, so very tired.

But Denna will be here any minute. And Kahlan knows she doesn't react kindly to find her sleeping on the floor without an explicit permission, especially in her very own sanctuary. Kahlan learned that lesson, like so many others, the hard way. Now she knows. And she's not fond of that particular memory that she'd like to refresh it ever again.

So she waits, upright, perturbed and—as always recently—utmost terrified.

On a cupboard, sand in an hourglass is starting to run out.

She hasn’t been to Denna’s chambers often, just in the beginning shortly after her arrival. A time that Denna believed she might break, if she touched Kahlan the way only lovers should. Made her moan her appellation into the deep of the night. Kept her on the edge for agonizing long hours. Looking back on it now, she realizes, it'd been the only times she'd felt something else than pain--or fear of more pain. She could drown in Denna then, in her touch and her desires, her own pleasure and not think about anything else. In a time long passed Denna shouldn't have been the one to hear her moans, but is there for them now.

The detailed memory of their encounters still raises a blush to her cheeks unbidden. It's not like she had a chance to explore all those physical aspects before she was captured. A part of her feels guilty that she partly enjoyed it, but then again there is no left to judge--no one left to confess to. Only Denna, who could brag to her sisters that she has screwed the Mother Confessor more times than anyone else—dead or alive.

The other Mord’Sith never touched her in that way. And she believes it is Denna's influence and cruel, violent streak that it was strictly followed. Today Kahlan knows it, but back then it'd crossed her mind often enough. Above all when she was left alone with an unknown Mord'Sith to be trained by them and Denna gone--for Kahlan to consider her Mistress' absence. It could have been way different--she knows--she has seen things. Unspeakable things done to other prisoners just like her. Or it was merely a possessive trait of Denna's or something else. Kahlan doesn’t know--nor does she care--for the reason, but for that, she is deeply grateful.

Maybe that will change when Darken Rahl arrives.

Since Denna told her yesterday, he is coming to fetch her--it’s all she thought about. For what he wants her, Denna did not say.

But she has more than a few unpleasant ideas. Kahlan shudders involuntary and forces her thoughts from him.

Not yet. There will be a time for that.

Instead, she wonders why she is here now. The last time Denna took her to bed had been months prior. Her gaze falls onto the wooden chest at the foot of the bed and a sense of longing tugs pleasantly deep in her stomach.

Kahlan can’t decide whether she wants for Denna to arrive quickly or for her Mistress to take her time. Kahlan looks over to the hourglass. It only has a candle-mark left.

She still hasn't found an answer to that question when the door creaks open not even a quarter of a candle-mark later and the Mord'Sith smiles rather mischievously at Kahlan.

In that moment Kahlan would kill a dwarf for more time.

---

After her almost encounter with Mistress Constance, Kahlan was relieved that she'd dodged that arrow--or well, Denna did for her.

Guards brought her water and clothes per Denna’s instructions in the morning and she had wondered, if the Mord'Sith had received message via journey-book that Darken Rahl may is to arrive earlier.

She considers to ask her, but then, she doesn't want to irritate her after yesterday, not when she showed a sliver of kindness. At least Kahlan wants to believe it was. Maybe it had never been Denna’s intention to hand her over to Constance in the first place and solely wanted to see how she'd fare. Kahlan can never be completely certain, not with Denna.

“Oh, you waited up on me, Mother Confessor.” Denna says as she enters--one eyebrow lifting as she regards her. "Such a rare honor." She rasps, as if she wasn't the one ordering for Kahlan to be brought--and stay--here. As if Kahlan had been given a choice.

“Come.” She says conciliatory and gestures for the small door on the other side of the room. "I've got a surprise for you." Her clear eyes sparkle with amusement.

Kahlan hesitates for the blink of an eye and it is not lost on Denna.

"You'll like it," she pauses for a beat, "I promise."

Despite the assurance, Kahlan can feel her hackles rising. It is not like Denna to promise anything, but she obeys--for what alternative does she have.

The air in the room is thick with steam and moisture, and Kahlan realizes it must be Denna's private bath. A sunken tub is dropped into the floor right at the center and a vast amount of flickering candles is scattered about.

"Take off your clothes." Denna orders condescendingly, when Kahlan only stares at her, puzzled. "And get in."

Her brow furrows slightly and the signs of uneasiness play out on her features. "Your stench is nothing I can endure much longer." She adds as an afterthought--and Kahlan recognizes the rebuke for what it truly is. As if she would've Kahlan use her private bath to clean herself or hasn't water brought down to the dungeons--albeit in a wooden bucket and ice-cold--for cleaning every morning.

She disrobes quickly before Denna changes her mind, pushing the clothes into a heap on the floor and steps in. A quiet moan escapes as she sinks into the hot, lightly scented water. Denna watches her for an instant longer--as she just sits there--feeling wondrous--and inclines her head. "Enjoy yourself," she husks with that arrogant smirk, sounding downright indecent and heads out for the main chamber.

The door only closes halfway after Denna, but it leaves Kahlan with a certain amount of privacy that she relishes. She can still hear the Mord'Sith in the other room--the clinking of glass, the opening and closing of drawers--as she submerges in water--soaking in all the warmth she can, sighing in unashamed delight. She never had the pleasure to use a bathtub as big and comfortable as this one. The hot water laps around her body and opens the gates for a feeling of total serenity she has not felt in ages. The sound of water rippling against the walls of the tub mingles with the noise far away in the other parts of the temple.

When Denna returns about half a candle-mark later, she is about to wash out the soap flakes that are dispersed in her hair. From the look Kahlan can see that her mood has drastically changed. The Mord'Sith will always remain a mystery to her; much like a puzzle who's pieces don't fit together, but in the end bring forth a masterpiece no one can tell how it came to be. For a minute Denna only stands in the doorway then moves to sit onto the edge of the sloshing water.

Denna bites her lip, the in indents are still visible as she suddenly grasps Kahlan, pulling her forward. "Why?" She demands, consumed with barely hidden rage ."For what could he still want you?"

Even Kahlan knows the question isn't for her to answer and Denna must know it too as she withdraws, stroking back an unruly strand of light hair, that has come out of its braid. She slams a hand down on the tiles instead, hard enough that Kahlan flinches beside her and the water ripples. "You were supposed to be mine forever .." Denna is seething now and something cracks behind those usually stoic features and Kahlan observes her with great concern. "You have been promised--and given to me--to do as I please."

"I hurt you because it gives me pleasure." Denna's jaw clenches tightly together. Eyes ablaze with pain and something akin to madness. "I did because--I can. Because you are mine." And mine alone --is what Kahlan hears and Denna doesn't dare to say.

A spark of hope ignites within her that Denna might be willing to safe her after all. But the spark flutters and burns out, as she recognizes, that even a woman as powerful as Denna has no means to defy Darken Rahl.

"If you have be afraid in the past Kahlan, realize, you haven't." Her voice is hoarse now, "Everything you accomplished, everything you've buried deep inside for no one to find--will be taken from you. If you thought I've been cruel to you--Lord Rahl will exceed the pain you suffered beyond all imagination or measure."

A feeling of dread creeps up on her and Kahlan tries to block out Denna's voice, but it has an uncanny way of slinking back in.

"He will stop at nothing and destroy everything you are. " Her index-finger nudges the spot where Kahlan's heart throbs against her ribcage.

Slowly, Denna moves, grasping the rim of the tub with a gloved hand. Her leathers creak with the movement and Kahlan's heart skips a beat. "Each mark I left on your body will be painted over--each progress we made-- together --will be reformed in Lord Rahl's image."

As she leans nearer and nearer Kahlan ignores the way her heart kind of speeds up, a spike of something she tells herself must be fear.

In a desolate, broken whisper Denna adds, "Each memory of us will be erased."

Dark lips touch to the corner of her mouth then, and linger. Much like the concern that turned into fear and no longer lurks in its shadows. Only today is the last day she spends with Denna and the realization shifts something within her. And Kahlan has no prospect of a life either way, so she dares to be reckless one last time--claiming Denna's mouth in a desperate, hungry kiss.

For a fraction of a second Denna freezes, but then returns the meeting of their skin with just as much vigor. Denna's mouth is warm and sweet and Kahlan follows the taste well past her lips. Deep down, Kahlan knows she won't get away with breaking the rules. Waits for the slap that will punish her for her insolence. Denna kisses her harder instead, licking into the slick heat of her mouth while she slides a hand to the back of her head, pulling her closer. Kahlan moves into the contact; water sloshes over the rim of the tub and she moans low and long--as an Agiel finally makes contact just beneath her chin--taking her by torturous surprise. She tries to jerk away from the pain on pure, feral instinct, but there's no way to go. Denna holds her tight, a hand buried in dark wet tresses and returns her kiss with abandon. A myriad of stars blossom behind her eyelids at excruciating agony it emits; Kahlan gasps and whimpers at the sheer intensity of the pain and Denna welcomes it--swallows it whole. Her tongue licks into Kahlan's mouth and by now even she trembles, lets out a soft noise of pain or pleasure.

Then it ends and from one moment to the next the pain recedes--as do Denna's lips from her own. A hand still rests against the bare skin of Kahlan's sternum. Her breath comes unsteady and Kahlan hears as she swallows hard.

"Something to remember me by." Denna rasps and the light of the candles reflects on her marble white skin. A taste of lipstick clings on Kahlan's tongue and she licks her lips--tastes blood instead.

Denna opens her eyes deliberately, her haunting gaze finds Kahlan’s. " I can't let him take you ." She whispers, it sounds distraught and furious in equal measure.

"I just.. can't." She stutters to a halt; seems honestly stricken for the first time Kahlan has ever witnessed. She wants to reach out and touch her, to comfort even. But she doesn't dare.

“So… I release you.”

Her eyes shine dark and wet and full of promise.

And just like that the spark of hope re-ignites.

For just a moment she looks at Kahlan, like she is memorizing her--then pushes Kahlan backwards.

Through the hourglass, the few remaining grains begin to fall.

Kahlan gasps and sucks in a hurried breath. But then there's only water and the hand on her chest pushes and pushes--until there's nowhere left to go.

Air becomes an issue quickly but Denna's hand is rigid—holding her down. Panic blossoms in her heart and spreads like wildfire--setting each nerve-ending aflame.

The water in the tub is clear and Kahlan’s eyes are wide open; staring up at Denna who is watching her struggle with pursed lips and stoic mask that crumbles.

It is not supposed to end this way, but--nonetheless--she wonders, if it's now time to go home.

Her heart pounds erratically in her ears and Kahlan thrashes and pushes.

Why is she resisting? This is all she ever wanted. It's Denna's final gift.

She grasps and clutches, but the arm keeps her steady--unrelenting like an iron pillar. Wet fingers slide over leather searching for purchase, anything to hold onto.

A tear slips over Denna's cheek as Kahlan’s lungs fill with water.

In a last ditch attempt she tries push Denna off, but in the end, it is as it always was with Denna--futile to resist her. The world around her blurs into shades of red and black.

She tries for a last clear thought, but her vision already darkens at the edges.

The last grain falls.

It was her last.

It's time to go.

Part 6